Surviving the Non-Routine

I can admit it.  I like to think of myself as a wild and crazy gal - the impulsive live-for-the-moment type. The truth is, though, that I am very much a creature of routine and habit. I seem to be happiest and most productive when I'm operating within my regular routine.  No, I did not say "stuck in a rut." If that's what you read between the lines, read it again.

As much as I love the holiday season (it's my favorite time of year), it's a routine buster. Nothing is as it usually is. I work less, kids are home from school, husband is right there - all the time. My 30 minute limit in the kitchen every night becomes hours of holiday cooking. Most of the people (employees and business associates) who are part of my life for at least 8 hours a day are completely absent. I am visited by the ghosts of Christmas past who remind me about the beloved family members who are not with us anymore, and I fight back by focusing on those who are with me now, clamoring for my attention.

Lots of people struggle with the dramatic shift from the routine during the holidays, not just the ADHD friends among us.

So, how do I deal with this period of non-routine without going crazy, hurting someone, or running back to the office early? Here are a few tricks I can share:

1. Make some time for yourself every day.  Maybe it's an hour early in the morning or late in the evening, but don't minimize the need for your own time alone.  I use it for prayer and meditation, and reading.
2. Don't completely abandon the routine. Pick parts of your routine that you will keep over the holidays.  I keep my morning routine as close to normal as possible. I also make sure to make some time to check my email and read every day.
3. If you are uncomfortable, tell those you love. Wouldn't you want to know if some you loved was a bit out of sorts? Speaking up about your discomfort can take away some of its power and make things a little easier.
4. Remember that your regular routine will return soon. Normal will come back. Don't worry.  Enjoy the distractions. Knowing that you'll have your routine back soon can give you the freedom to really enjoy now.

My time of escape to write this is almost over.  It's time to step back into that holiday world.

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Knowing the Rules vs Following the Rules

Anyone who knows me well knows that I am, generally speaking, a rule follower and law obeyer.  Yes, I am the one who stops at a red light on a country road at night when there is clearly no one around, waiting patiently for the green light. I do my best (although not perfectly) to adhere to the speed limit. I don't park in parking spaces designated for the disabled, and I don't violate warnings of "No Trespassing."

In most of my life, knowing the rules and following the rules are the same thing.

But it's not true with writing.

Oh, I know the rules.  I definitely know all the rules. I just choose not to follow them all the time.  Call it my own personal little rebellion against "the man."  I'll defiantly start sentences with conjunctions (like I just did above), or I'll brazenly end sentences with prepositions. I'm the queen of the run-on sentence and the duchess of the dangling participle.

Why?  Because it's the prerogative of creativity to ignore the rules sometimes.

However, you really have to know the rules well first.  I've read pieces of writing that were riddled with grammatical errors that were obviously unintentional.  That's not creativity.  That's poor writing. I've also read writing that was masterfully written; not only did the grammatical "errors" not interfere with the meaning of the piece, but they actually enhanced it by clarifying the voice of the author. It's a thing of beauty when it's done right.  It's painful to read when it's not.

So, here I sit with more education than should be allowed by law, expertly  aware of the rules of writing and doing whatever I want to anyway. I'm a rebel. I'm a literary outlaw.

I'm a writer.

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Just Like Breathing

I was corresponding with an acquaintance recently, and he asked what I had read lately.  As I was going through the list with him, he interrupted and said, "Whoa! You must have lots of free time on your hands.  I don't have time to read like that." I laughed, remembering that this person didn't know me very well.  I simply answered," I can't not read. For me, reading and writing are just like breathing."  And so it is.

On any given day, I'll read parts of two or three novels, pieces of several non-fiction books, a newspaper, email, twitter, Facebook posts, and a wide variety of articles and essays. It's not a hardship or something I struggle to do.  I do it just because. I do it because it just feels like the right thing to do.  Like breathing.

George R.R. Martin wrote, "The mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone."  Without a whetstone, a sword becomes dull and, eventually, useless. The same thing happens to the mind without reading...at least that's how it is for me.

I can't imagine a life without reading. I can feel my brain begin to atrophy if I'm forced to cut back on my reading for a day or two due to social events or work (fortunately, my work requires that I read and write a lot). I find my connection to most of the rest of humankind in the written word. That doesn't mean I don't socialize or enjoy conversation, but that there is a depth of understanding that I can process best through the written word. My closest relationships have been developed at some point in the relationship through writing (letters or email or shared journaling).

And just as breathing requires inhaling and exhaling, feeding fully on the written word usually involved both taking it in (reading) and letting it out (through writing or conversation) after it has gone through me, nourished me, changed me in some way. I could no more keep it all inside without sharing it than I could hold my breath forever.

Knowledge and wisdom are meant to circulate among us - like air.

And that circulation sustains me.

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